Category Archives: Letters to the Universe

Dear Woman Who Kept Touching The Books I was Putting Away,

You know, it is very rude to stand beside someone fixing a shelf of books and ruin the hard work by leaning against the shelves.  Also, who watches their kid push in every other book after I carefully edged them all?  Honestly.  What gives?  I bet you’re the kind of person who brings library books to the beach and destroys them with sand and water.  Please feel appropriately ashamed.  May every book you ever need be shelved incorrectly or checked out.

Love,

The girl standing beside you, glaring every time you touched the books she was shelving

Dear Girl in the Purple Dress,

At first I thought you were weird because you watched me through the window as I shoveled cereal into my face.  And then I was annoyed because you interrupted my makeshift breakfast to ask for books about Halloween costumes.  However, when I found you the books and you turned to me and told I was very beautiful, I nearly cried.  Thank you for making me smile, even if I was still chewing corn flakes.

Love,

The woman who showed you the Halloween books