Gratitude: E

E is for Eating Disorder

This was a very difficult topic to write about because it’s something I’m still working not to ignore.  My relationship with food is destructive and borders on self-harm at times.  While this is hard for me to always talk about, accepting it has been easier than I thought it would be.

Knowing that food is a trigger has caused me to slow down when entering parties and situations where food will not be my ally.  I often have to sit down and come up with a real action plan, and then struggle to see it through.  It’s hard for me to go to someone’s house  or to a party and not feel resentment towards someone who isn’t helping me navigate the food.

Having people in my life that help me figure out new and healthy ways to combat my tendency to binge eat and self-harm is important to finding a healthy middle ground to existing in a food-driven world without hurting myself each time I am in front of a feast.

It’s getting easier, and I am always grateful to those who help me each day.  I may not mention it, but I am infinitely grateful.

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