Dear Stranger That Tried To Convert Me To Islam,
I am very confused as to why you were so sneaky about handing me the books. I thought we had a very intellectual, though inappropriate, conversation about free-thinkers and religion. Even though it caused my coworkers to come over and try to pry me away from your questions, I thought it was harmless. Until you handed me the book within a book, that is. I also heard you went and spoke to several other women about it too. That made me feel like you were cheating on me with other unsuspecting young women. I kind of want to tell the other guy that tried to convert me to Christianity about you, then kindly hand you both a gladiator q-tip and watch you smack it out for my soul.
Love,
The confused employee